Every October, people around the world come together for Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. For many families, this month is not just about more than awareness, it’s about lived experience. Behind the statistics are parents, siblings, and loved ones who carry the weight of dreams that ended too soon.

Understanding Pregnancy and Infant Loss

Pregnancy and infant loss is a broad term that includes miscarriage, stillbirth, and neonatal death. While often hidden in silence, it is far more common than many realize. In the United States alone, about one in four pregnancies end in miscarriage. Every year, thousands of families experience stillbirth or the loss of an infant within the first year of life.

Numbers only tell part of the story. Behind each statistic is a family that prepared, hoped, and loved deeply. The loss may happen early in pregnancy, or it may occur after holding a baby in their arms. Each experience is unique, yet the grief connects families in a shared understanding that words often cannot fully capture.

Awareness matters because silence can deepen the isolation parents feel. When we acknowledge the reality of loss, we create space for healing and community.

The Emotional Impact on Families

Grief after pregnancy or infant loss does not follow a straight line. It can appear in waves. Sometimes as sadness, sometimes as anger, sometimes as numbness. Parents may feel guilt, wondering if they could have done something differently. They may also feel confusion, struggling to reconcile their expectations with a painful reality.

Partners often grieve differently. One may want to talk about the loss openly, while the other prefers quiet reflection. Both experiences are valid. Siblings may also feel the absence in ways that are difficult to express, especially if they are young and trying to make sense of the loss.

Long-term, parents often carry this grief through anniversaries, birthdays that never come, and family milestones. Everyday moments can serve as reminders. A baby shower invitation, a first-day-of-school photo, or even a song can unexpectedly evoke emotions.

There is no “right” way to grieve. Every family deserves patience, support, and understanding as they move through their own process.

Why Awareness Matters

For generations, pregnancy and infant loss remained in the shadows. Families were told not to talk about it, to “move on” or “try again.” That silence often compounded the grief, making parents feel unseen and alone.

Awareness changes that. When we speak openly about loss, we help remove the stigma. We let families know that their grief is real and valid. Awareness also encourages communities to respond with compassion instead of avoidance.

One meaningful tradition is the Wave of Light held on October 15th, the official Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. Families around the world light candles at 7 p.m. in their local time zones, creating a continuous wave of light that circles the globe. It’s a beautiful reminder that no family grieves alone.

By breaking the silence, we create a culture where love and loss can coexist.

How to Support Someone Experiencing Loss

If someone you love has experienced pregnancy or infant loss, you may wonder what to say or do. While no action can take away the pain, thoughtful support can make the journey a little less heavy.

Offer practical help. Meals, childcare, running errands, or helping with household chores can ease the daily pressures that feel overwhelming in grief.

Listen with compassion. Sometimes parents don’t need advice; they need someone who will sit with them and listen without judgment. Avoid phrases like “everything happens for a reason” or “you can try again.” While well-meaning, these words can minimize the loss. Instead, try:

• “I’m so sorry for your loss.”
• “Your baby mattered.”
• “I’m here for you, no matter what you need.”

Respect their process. Some parents may want to share their story, while others need quiet space. Follow their lead and offer flexibility.

Remember the long-term. Grief doesn’t end after a few weeks. Checking in on anniversaries or simply asking, “How are you doing today?” months later shows you haven’t forgotten.

Support is not about fixing pain, it’s about walking alongside someone with care and presence.

Honoring and Remembering

Many families find comfort in creating rituals or keepsakes to honor their baby’s memory. These gestures do not erase grief, but they can help families integrate love and remembrance into their lives.

Some ideas include:

• Creating a memory box with ultrasound photos, hospital bands, or letters.
• Planting a tree or flowers as a living tribute.
• Writing in a journal or creating art as an outlet for emotions.
• Participating in remembrance events like the Wave of Light.

These acts acknowledge that a baby’s life, no matter how brief, left an imprint. They also offer families a tangible way to carry forward love.

Finding Community and Professional Help

No one should grieve in isolation. Connecting with others who understand can provide comfort and validation. Many communities have support groups for parents who have experienced loss, both locally and online. Organizations such as Share, the MISS Foundation, and Still Standing Magazine offer resources, stories, and spaces to connect.

Professional counseling can also be a powerful tool. Grief can affect relationships, mental health, and daily life. A trained therapist can provide guidance and strategies for navigating these challenges.

Seeking help is not a sign of weakness. It is an act of care—for yourself, your partner, and your family.

How Milk by Mom Honors Every Journey

At Milk by Mom, we recognize that every motherhood journey is deeply personal—and some are marked by unimaginable grief. For parents navigating loss, preserving breast milk can be a meaningful way to hold onto love, memory, and connection. That milk tells a story of devotion that deserves to be seen. We meet each family with empathy, honoring not just their need for care and flexibility, but their lived experience. This month and always, we stand beside grieving families. We honor their babies, their strength, and their enduring love.